The Language of Flowers: Victorian Flower Meanings for Love and Romance
The language of flowers is a system for sending messages with blossoms, where each flower stands for a feeling or a phrase. A rose means love, a red tulip is a declaration of love, and a forget-me-not means true love. The idea is old, but it reached its height in the 1800s, when illustrated "flower dictionaries" listed hundreds of plants and their meanings so people could compose bouquets that spoke for them. The fancy name for it is floriography, which simply means "writing with flowers."
There's a catch that most modern lists leave out: the dictionaries didn't always agree. The same flower could mean "constancy" in one book and "play" in another. This guide walks through where the language came from, gives you clear tables of romantic meanings straight from two 19th-century flower dictionaries, shows where they disagree, and ends with ideas for building your own bouquet with a message.
What Is the Language of Flowers?
At its simplest, the language of flowers is a code. Each flower, and sometimes each color or variety of a flower, has a meaning attached to it. Put several flowers together, and you've written a sentence.
The meanings were collected in small books, usually alphabetical, that worked like a dictionary. You'd look up "Myrtle" and find "Love." You'd look up "Jonquil" and find "I desire a return of affection." Some entries are single words, others are entire phrases, and a few are surprisingly dramatic.
Two of those books are freely available today and serve as the backbone of this guide:
- Henrietta Dumont's The Floral Offering, also titled The Language of Flowers, published in Philadelphia by H. C. Peck & Theo. Bliss in 1851. You can read it through Project Gutenberg's edition of Dumont.
- Kate Greenaway's Language of Flowers, published in London by George Routledge and Sons, with color printing by Edmund Evans. Greenaway (1846 to 1901) was a much-loved illustrator. Her book is available through Project Gutenberg's edition of Greenaway.
When this article says a flower "means" something, it will tell you which book says so. That's the honest way to handle a code that was never officially standardized.
Before the Dictionaries: Shakespeare's Flowers
Long before anyone printed a flower dictionary, writers used flowers to carry meaning. The most famous example in English comes from Hamlet. In Act 4, Scene 5, Ophelia, grieving and overwhelmed, hands out flowers and herbs, naming what each one stands for. As the Folger Shakespeare Library's text of Hamlet shows, she begins:
There's rosemary, that's for remembrance. Pray you, love, remember. And there is pansies, that's for thoughts.
She goes on to fennel and columbines, then rue, "herb of grace o' Sundays," and a daisy, and adds that she'd give violets, "but they withered all when my father died." Audiences in Shakespeare's time would have caught meanings in each one. That scene shows that flower symbolism was already familiar to ordinary playgoers in Shakespeare's day.
Henrietta Dumont noticed this too. The preface to her 1851 book points to Ophelia's madness as proof that Shakespeare knew the language of flowers. And two of Ophelia's meanings survived almost unchanged into Greenaway's dictionary centuries later: rosemary for "Remembrance" and pansy for "Thoughts."
Shakespeare used flowers for love, too. In A Midsummer Night's Dream, Act 2, Scene 1, Oberon describes "a little western flower" that "maidens call... 'love-in-idleness.'" According to the Folger's text of A Midsummer Night's Dream, its juice on sleeping eyelids "will make or man or woman madly dote" on the next living creature they see. It's a comic plot device, but it captures the old idea that flowers have power over the heart.
Lady Mary Wortley Montagu and the Turkish Love Letter
The language of flowers is often said to have traveled to Western Europe from the Ottoman Empire, and one 18th-century letter is usually given as the key evidence. It was written by Lady Mary Wortley Montagu, an English aristocrat and writer.
According to Lewis Melville's biography, Lady Mary Wortley Montague, Her Life and Letters, she traveled with her husband's embassy to Constantinople (today's Istanbul) during 1716 to 1718. Her letters from the trip were first published in three volumes in 1763.
In one of them, Letter XL, written from Pera and addressed only "To the Lady ----," she answers a friend who'd asked for a Turkish love letter. What she sends isn't written at all. It's a set of small objects, each linked to a rhyming line in Turkish that carried a message. In the 1790 edition of her letters, she gives translations such as these:
| Object | Message, as Montagu translated it |
|---|---|
| Pearl | "Fairest of the young" |
| Clove | "You are as slender as the clove!" |
| Jonquil | "Have pity on my passion!" |
She added that there was no color, flower, weed, fruit, herb, pebble or feather that didn't have a verse belonging to it. Notice two things. First, her "language" wasn't only flowers; pebbles and feathers were part of it too. Second, the meaning came from a rhyme, not from the flower's look or nature. That's quite different from the neat one-flower, one-meaning dictionaries that came later. Still, her letter made Europeans curious about sending messages with objects, and flowers were the prettiest way to do it.
The Flower Dictionaries of the 1800s
By the middle of the 1800s, flower dictionaries were being printed on both sides of the Atlantic. Dumont's book appeared in Philadelphia in 1851, and Greenaway's illustrated edition came out in London later in the century. These books turned an idea into a reference tool.
Dumont's preface makes big claims. It says flowers have a "real and natural significance," that in the East the language "has been universally understood and applied," and that in Europe it existed among ordinary people long before scholars noticed it. Those are the author's opinions, not proven history, but they show how romantic the idea felt to readers at the time.
Greenaway's book is mostly a list, decorated with her charming illustrations of children and flowers. It runs alphabetically and includes many varieties of the same flower. There are around thirty separate rose entries alone, from "Rose, Austrian" to "Rose, York and Lancaster." It also includes a section of flower poems by writers such as Herrick, Keats, Shelley, Milton and Chaucer.
These books were gifts as much as references. They were small, pretty and meant to be kept, which is part of why so many survive and why the language of flowers is still remembered today.
Flower Meanings for Love and Romance
Here are romantic meanings exactly as they appear in Kate Greenaway's Language of Flowers. If you want a bouquet that says something sweet, this is the place to start.
| Flower | Meaning in Greenaway |
|---|---|
| Rose | Love |
| Tulip, red | Declaration of love |
| Forget me not | True love. Forget me not. |
| Myrtle | Love |
| Ivy | Fidelity. Marriage. |
| Jonquil | I desire a return of affection |
| Ambrosia | Love returned |
| Clover, four-leaved | Be mine |
| Clover, white | Think of me |
| Lilac, purple | First emotions of love |
| Pink, red double | Pure and ardent love |
| Pink, carnation | Woman's love |
| Chrysanthemum, red | I love |
| Honeysuckle | Generous and devoted affection |
| Heliotrope | Devotion. Faithfulness. |
| Violet, blue | Faithfulness |
| Bluebell | Constancy |
| Gillyflower | Bonds of affection |
| Rose, bridal | Happy love |
| Rose, thornless | Early attachment |
| Rosebud, moss | Confession of love |
| Rose, Austrian | Thou art all that is lovely |
| Orange blossoms | Your purity equals your loveliness |
| Mignonette | Your qualities surpass your charms |
A few of these are worth a second look. "Rose, Maiden Blush" means "If you love me, you will find it out," which is coy and playful. "Rose, white and red together" means "Unity," a lovely choice for a wedding. And "Rose, full-blown, placed over two buds" means "Secrecy," so the arrangement itself, not just the flower, could carry a message.
Old-fashioned flower phrases pair beautifully with old-fashioned words of affection. If you like the sound of "Thou art all that is lovely," you'll enjoy our collection of vintage terms of endearment.
Why the Meanings Don't Always Agree
Here's what most modern "flower meaning" lists won't tell you: the 19th-century dictionaries disagreed with each other, sometimes completely. Compare Dumont's American book of 1851 with Greenaway's London book.
| Flower | Greenaway (London) | Dumont (Philadelphia, 1851) |
|---|---|---|
| White rose | I am worthy of you | I would be single |
| Yellow rose | Decrease of love. Jealousy. | Jealousy |
| Rose (plain or red) | Love (plain rose) | Beauty and love (red rose) |
| Ivy | Fidelity. Marriage. | Constancy |
| Hyacinth | Sport. Game. Play. | Constancy |
| Peony | Shame. Bashfulness. | Anger |
| Lily of the valley | Return of happiness | Modesty |
| Daffodil | Regard | Self-love (with narcissus) |
| Sunflower | Tall: Haughtiness. Dwarf: Adoration. | False riches |
| Pansy | Thoughts | Think of me |
| Violet | Blue: Faithfulness. Sweet: Modesty. | Modest worth |
| Lilac | Purple: First emotions of love | First emotions of love |
| Myrtle | Love | Love |
| Daisy | Innocence | Innocence |
| Marigold | Grief | Grief |
| Lavender | Distrust | Distrust |
Some meanings are rock-steady: myrtle for love, daisy for innocence, lilac for first love, marigold for grief. Others swing wildly. Imagine sending white roses to say "I am worthy of you" and having your sweetheart read them, from a different book, as "I would be single." Ouch.
Why the differences? Each author compiled meanings from earlier sources, added their own, and sometimes changed entries to suit their readers. There was no official body deciding what a peony meant. The lesson for today is simple: if you're sending a message with flowers, include a card that says what you mean. The code is charming, but plain words remove all doubt.
A Closer Look at Romantic Favorites
Tables are handy, but a few flowers deserve a fuller explanation, because they're the ones people actually give each other most often. Here's what the two dictionaries say about each, plus some practical notes.
Rose
The rose is the headline flower of romance in both books. Greenaway gives the plain rose a single, perfect word: "Love." Dumont gives the red rose "Beauty and love." Where they part ways is color and variety, which is why the rose has its own section below. If you want the safest rose message, give a bunch of mixed red and white roses together. Greenaway lists that combination as "Unity," which is about as sweet as a flower message gets.
Tulip
Here's a flower where variety changes everything. In Greenaway, the plain tulip means "Fame," the red tulip means "Declaration of love," the variegated tulip means "Beautiful eyes," and the yellow tulip means "Hopeless love." Dumont lists the tulip as "Declaration of love." So if you want to say "I love you" with tulips, red is the color to choose, and a few variegated ones mixed in add a compliment about your partner's eyes.
Forget-me-not
The forget-me-not's meaning is printed right in its name. Greenaway lists it as "True love. Forget me not." It's small and delicate, so it works best as a little posy, a pressed flower in a letter, or a detail in a larger bouquet rather than the star of the show.
Myrtle
Myrtle is one of the few flowers whose meaning is identical in both dictionaries: "Love." It's an evergreen shrub with small white flowers and glossy leaves, which makes it a lovely filler in a bouquet. Because the meaning is so steady, it's a safe choice if you're worried about mixed messages.
Ivy
Ivy isn't a flower, but greenery counted in the code too. Greenaway gives it "Fidelity. Marriage." and Dumont gives it "Constancy." Either way, the message is about staying together. Greenaway even lists a "Sprig of ivy, with tendrils" as "Assiduous to please," meaning eager and attentive. It's a natural choice for wedding and anniversary arrangements.
Lilac
Lilac is another flower where the books line up. Greenaway gives purple lilac "First emotions of love," and Dumont gives lilac "First emotions of love" as well. White lilac in Greenaway means "Youthful innocence." It's the ideal flower for a new relationship, or for remembering the early days of a long one.
Honeysuckle
Greenaway calls honeysuckle "Generous and devoted affection," one of the warmest entries in her whole book. Dumont lists it, under the name woodbine, as "Affection." The vine's habit of wrapping around whatever supports it makes the meaning easy to remember.
Pansy
Pansy means "Thoughts" in Greenaway and "Think of me" in Dumont, both echoing Ophelia's line in Hamlet. A small pot of pansies with a note saying "thinking of you" is a gentle way to reach out to someone who's far away or having a hard week.
Violet
Violets come in several kinds in Greenaway's list. The blue violet means "Faithfulness," the sweet violet means "Modesty," the yellow violet means "Rural happiness," and the dame violet means "Watchfulness." Dumont's violet means "Modest worth." For a partner, blue violets are the romantic pick.
Herbs and Greenery in the Language of Flowers
The code wasn't limited to showy blooms. Herbs and leaves carried meanings too, and they're often easier to find and cheaper to grow. All of these come from Greenaway's dictionary.
| Plant | Meaning in Greenaway | Romantic use |
|---|---|---|
| Rosemary | Remembrance | Anniversaries, keepsakes, a sprig in a wedding bouquet |
| Myrtle | Love | Filler greenery for any love bouquet |
| Ivy | Fidelity. Marriage. | Weddings and anniversaries |
| Fern | Fascination | A gentle hint that you can't stop thinking about someone |
| Clover, four-leaved | Be mine | Tucked into a card or proposal note |
| Clover, white | Think of me | Notes to a partner who's away |
| Mistletoe | I surmount difficulties | A winter message about getting through hard times together |
| Holly | Foresight | Holiday decor with a quiet meaning |
| Thyme | Activity | A playful gift for a busy, energetic partner |
| Basil | Hatred | Best kept in the kitchen |
Mistletoe is a fun surprise. Most people link it only with holiday kisses, but in Greenaway's book it means "I surmount difficulties." That gives a sprig over the doorway a second, deeper message: we'll get through anything.
Flowers With Not-So-Romantic Meanings
Not every bloom says something sweet. If you're choosing flowers for a partner and you care about the old meanings, here are some to think twice about, all as listed in Greenaway.
| Flower | Meaning in Greenaway | When it might still work |
|---|---|---|
| Rose, yellow | Decrease of love. Jealousy. | Today, yellow roses are widely given for friendship; add a card |
| Tulip, yellow | Hopeless love | Bright spring arrangements where nobody's reading the code |
| Carnation, yellow | Disdain | Mixed bouquets, with a note |
| Carnation, striped | Refusal | Hard to rescue; maybe skip for a proposal |
| Chrysanthemum, yellow | Slighted love | Autumn decor rather than a love note |
| Basil | Hatred | Your kitchen, not your bouquet |
| Lavender | Distrust | Calming sachets and gardens |
| Marigold | Grief | Remembrance and memorial flowers |
| Dahlia | Instability | Garden displays |
| Sweet pea | Departure | A farewell gift, which is actually touching |
| Lily, yellow | Falsehood. Gaiety. | Cheerful arrangements, with a note |
| Narcissus | Egotism | Spring pots for yourself |
Don't panic if your favorite flower is on this list. Very few people today read bouquets with a dictionary in hand. The old meanings are a fun layer, not a rulebook. If the flower makes your partner smile, that's the message that counts.
Roses: One Flower, Many Messages
Roses get special treatment in the flower dictionaries because they come in so many colors and forms. Greenaway's book gives the plain rose the meaning "Love," then splits it into dozens of variations. Here are the ones most useful for couples:
- Rose: Love
- Rosebud, red: Pure and lovely
- Rosebud, white: Girlhood
- Rosebud, moss: Confession of love
- Rose, white: I am worthy of you
- Rose, deep red: Bashful shame
- Rose, bridal: Happy love
- Rose, cabbage: Ambassador of love
- Rose, campion: Only deserve my love
- Rose, daily: Thy smile I aspire to
- Rose, China: Beauty always new
- Rose, single: Simplicity
- Rose, thornless: Early attachment
- Rose, white and red together: Unity
- Roses, crown of: Reward of virtue
Some rose meanings are surprising. "Rose, Carolina" means "Love is dangerous," and "Rose, Japan" means "Beauty is your only attraction," which is not the compliment it first appears to be. "Rose, York and Lancaster," named for two rival English royal houses, means "War."
A note on the modern habit of reading roses strictly by color: today's florists often say red means romance, pink means admiration and yellow means friendship. Those are modern conventions, and they're perfectly nice ones, but they aren't what the 19th-century dictionaries said. Greenaway's deep red rose meant "Bashful shame," and Dumont's red rose meant "Beauty and love."
How Flower Messages Were Read
The dictionaries suggest the code could get quite detailed. Here's how a flower message could be built up, using only entries from Greenaway.
Single flowers
The simplest message is one bloom. A single red tulip says "Declaration of love." A sprig of rosemary says "Remembrance." Easy to send and easy to read.
Combinations
Put flowers together and they form a phrase. Myrtle (Love) plus ivy (Fidelity. Marriage.) reads like a wedding wish. Jonquil (I desire a return of affection) plus ambrosia (Love returned) tells a whole little story: I hoped you'd love me back, and you did.
Arrangement
The way flowers were placed could matter too. Greenaway lists "Rose, full-blown, placed over two buds" as "Secrecy." And "Rose, white and red together" means "Unity," so mixing two colors in one bunch carried its own meaning beyond each flower alone.
Varieties
Variety names mattered as much as the flower. A blue violet meant "Faithfulness," while a sweet violet meant "Modesty," and a yellow violet meant "Rural happiness." For the code to work, sender and receiver had to agree on which flower was which, and, as we've seen, on which book they were using.
Try It Yourself: Build a Bouquet With a Message
The examples below are illustrative, showing how you might use Greenaway's meanings today. Florist availability varies by season and region, so swap in what you can find.
For an anniversary
Flowers: roses, ivy and blue violets. Message: Love, fidelity and marriage, and faithfulness. Card idea: "Roses for love, ivy for our marriage, violets for faithfulness. Happy anniversary."
For a first date or new relationship
Flowers: purple lilac and a thornless rose. Message: First emotions of love, and early attachment. Card idea: "In the old language of flowers, lilac means first feelings of love. Seemed fitting."
For a proposal
Flowers: red tulips, myrtle and a four-leaved clover tucked in the card. Message: Declaration of love, love, and "Be mine." It's hard to find a clearer message in the whole code.
For someone far away
Flowers: forget-me-nots, white clover and rosemary. Message: True love, think of me, and remembrance. Perfect for a long-distance partner or a deployment send-off.
For making up after a disagreement
Flowers: honeysuckle and blue violets. Message: Generous and devoted affection, and faithfulness. Pair it with a real apology in words, because flowers can open a conversation but can't finish it.
For a wedding
Flowers: orange blossoms, myrtle, ivy and red and white roses together. Message: Your purity equals your loveliness, love, fidelity and marriage, and unity. This one reads like a blessing.
Whatever you choose, write the meanings on the card. Half the fun is letting your partner discover that the bouquet was a secret message all along. For more ways to turn a small gesture into something memorable, see our guide to ways to make your partner feel special, and if you're planning ahead for February, our Valentine's Day ideas pair nicely with a coded bouquet.
Flowers for Every Stage of a Relationship
Because Greenaway's dictionary is so detailed, you can find a flower for almost every chapter of a love story. Here's one way to map them, using only her meanings.
- A crush you haven't confessed: fern, "Fascination," or the maiden blush rose, "If you love me, you will find it out."
- Hoping they feel the same: jonquil, "I desire a return of affection."
- The first date: purple lilac, "First emotions of love," or a thornless rose, "Early attachment."
- Saying "I love you" for the first time: a moss rosebud, "Confession of love," or a red tulip, "Declaration of love."
- Finding out they love you too: ambrosia, "Love returned."
- The proposal: a four-leaved clover, "Be mine."
- The wedding: orange blossoms, myrtle, ivy, and the bridal rose, "Happy love."
- Long years together: bluebell, "Constancy," and heliotrope, "Devotion. Faithfulness."
- Time apart: forget-me-not, "True love," and white clover, "Think of me."
- Remembering: rosemary, "Remembrance."
Some couples give one flower from this list on each anniversary, working through the story year by year. It's a sweet tradition that costs very little and gives every bouquet a reason.
How to Write the Card
Since the old meanings varied, the card is where your message becomes clear. Here are a few simple formats you can copy.
The key
List each flower with its meaning, then add one line of your own. For example: "Red tulips: a declaration of love. Myrtle: love. Ivy: fidelity. All of it: you."
The riddle
Don't explain anything at first. Write "Look up what these mean" and let your partner discover the message. Then follow up later with the answer, or leave a copy of the meanings somewhere they'll find it.
The single line
Pick the one flower that says the most and build the whole card around it: "In the old language of flowers, the forget-me-not means true love. So, here's a reminder."
Name your source
If you're a history lover, add "according to Kate Greenaway's Language of Flowers." It's a charming detail, and it heads off confusion if your partner looks up a different list online and finds a different meaning.
Reading an Old Flower Dictionary Yourself
Both books used in this guide are free to read online, and browsing them is a pleasure. A few tips will help you make sense of them.
- Look for variety names. Many entries are split by color or type, like "Rose, White" and "Rose, Yellow." Always check whether your flower has a more specific entry.
- Expect old spellings. Greenaway's list spells mignonette as "Mignionette" and has small printing slips, such as "Jealously" where "Jealousy" is meant.
- Read the poems. Greenaway's book includes a section of flower poems. They show how writers used flowers as symbols long before the dictionaries.
- Compare books. If a meaning surprises you, check it against the other dictionary. You'll often find a gentler alternative.
- Remember the date. These books reflect the manners of their time. Some meanings, like the white rosebud's "Girlhood," made more sense to 19th-century readers than to us.
Common Myths About the Language of Flowers
Myth: Every flower has one fixed meaning
As the comparison table shows, the dictionaries disagreed. Hyacinth meant "Sport. Game. Play." in Greenaway and "Constancy" in Dumont. There was never a single official version.
Myth: Victorians constantly sent secret flower messages
The dictionaries were popular, and the idea was clearly loved, but a book existing doesn't prove that everyone used it in daily courtship. It's safer to think of the language of flowers as a fashionable, romantic pastime that some people enjoyed, rather than a code the whole society spoke.
Myth: The language was imported whole from Turkey
Lady Mary Wortley Montagu's letter describes a message system using objects and rhymes, including pebbles and feathers, not a one-flower, one-meaning dictionary. Her letter helped spark interest, but the European flower dictionaries were their own creation. And as Shakespeare shows, flower symbolism was already part of English culture long before her trip.
Myth: Red always means romance
That's a modern florist's convention. In Greenaway, the deep red rose meant "Bashful shame." The red tulip, red double pink and red chrysanthemum are the reliably romantic reds in her book.
Bringing the Language of Flowers Into Everyday Romance
You don't need a full bouquet to use the language of flowers. Small touches work beautifully:
- Press a single forget-me-not into a card for a partner who's traveling.
- Plant rosemary by the door as a daily "remember" between you.
- Use a flower's meaning as a private nickname. Calling someone "my four-leaf clover" quietly says "be mine." Our list of pretty names to call your girlfriend includes several flower-inspired ideas.
- Sign a love note with a tiny drawing of a flower and its meaning underneath.
- Give a single moss rosebud, "Confession of love," when you say "I love you" for the first time.
Flowers and terms of endearment have a lot in common. Both turn a feeling into a small, giftable thing. If you enjoy the history of romantic words, our guide to terms of endearment traces where "honey," "darling" and other classics came from, and our list of old-fashioned nicknames for your boyfriend has plenty of names with a 19th-century feel.
Wrapping Up
The language of flowers lets a bouquet speak: rose for love, red tulip for a declaration, forget-me-not for true love, myrtle for love and ivy for marriage. Its roots run from Shakespeare's Ophelia through Lady Mary Wortley Montagu's 18th-century letters to the flower dictionaries of the 1800s, like Dumont's in Philadelphia and Greenaway's in London. Those books didn't always agree, so the safest way to send a flower message today is to tuck in a card that spells it out.
Want a sweet name to sign that card with? Try the free nickname generator on our homepage. Pick who it's for, like boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife, fiancé(e), crush or partner, choose a vibe such as romantic, classic or cute and sweet, and read the "why it works" note for each suggestion. Save favorites to your shortlist, and try the Couple Name Mixer to blend your two names into one.
Which Flower for Which Moment
This table pairs the stages of a relationship with a flower from the dictionaries and the message it carries.
| Moment | Flower | Message |
|---|---|---|
| A crush you haven't confessed | Fern | "Fascination" |
| Hoping they feel the same | Jonquil | "I desire a return of affection" |
| The first date | Purple lilac | "First emotions of love" |
| Saying "I love you" for the first time | Moss rosebud | "Confession of love" |
| Finding out they love you too | Ambrosia | "Love returned" |
| The proposal | Four-leaved clover | "Be mine" |
| The wedding | Bridal rose | "Happy love" |
| Time apart | Forget-me-not | "True love" |
Frequently Asked Questions
What is the language of flowers?
The language of flowers, also called floriography, is a code in which each flower stands for a feeling or phrase, so a bouquet can carry a message. It was collected in flower dictionaries during the 1800s, such as Henrietta Dumont's book published in Philadelphia in 1851 and Kate Greenaway's illustrated book published in London. In Greenaway, for example, a rose means love, a red tulip means a declaration of love, and ivy means fidelity and marriage. The meanings were never official, and different books sometimes disagreed.
Which flower means I love you?
In Kate Greenaway's Language of Flowers, the red chrysanthemum means I love, which is about as close to a literal I love you as the code gets. Other strong choices from the same book are the rose, meaning love; the red tulip, meaning declaration of love; myrtle, meaning love; and the red double pink, meaning pure and ardent love. If you want to be completely clear, combine one of these with a handwritten card. That way your message lands even if your partner has never heard of floriography.
What does a yellow rose mean in the language of flowers?
In the 19th-century flower dictionaries, yellow roses had a rather sad meaning. Kate Greenaway's book lists the yellow rose as decrease of love and jealousy, and Henrietta Dumont's 1851 book lists it simply as jealousy. Today, many people give yellow roses as a cheerful sign of friendship, and few recipients will read anything negative into them. If you're giving yellow roses to a partner and want to avoid any doubt, add a card saying what you mean, or mix them with red tulips or plain roses.
What flower symbolizes true love?
The forget-me-not is the classic choice. Kate Greenaway's Language of Flowers gives its meaning as true love and forget me not, which makes it perfect for long-distance partners or anniversaries. Other options with faithful, lasting meanings in her book include the blue violet for faithfulness, the bluebell for constancy, ivy for fidelity and marriage, and the heliotrope for devotion and faithfulness. Combining two or three of these in a small posy makes a sweet message of lasting love.
Who started the language of flowers?
No single person started it. Flower symbolism appears in English literature well before the dictionaries, as Ophelia's flowers in Hamlet show. Lady Mary Wortley Montagu's letters from the Ottoman Empire, written during her husband's 1716 to 1718 embassy and published in 1763, described a Turkish way of sending messages with objects, which sparked European interest. In the 1800s, writers compiled flower dictionaries, such as Henrietta Dumont's 1851 book in Philadelphia and Kate Greenaway's book in London.
Why do flower meanings differ between sources?
Because there was never an official standard. Each 19th-century author gathered meanings from earlier books, added their own and adjusted entries for their readers. That's why Kate Greenaway lists the hyacinth as sport, game and play while Henrietta Dumont lists it as constancy, and why Greenaway's white rose says I am worthy of you while Dumont's says I would be single. Some meanings are steady across books, like myrtle for love and daisy for innocence. When in doubt, include a card explaining your message.
What flowers mean friendship rather than romance?
Kate Greenaway's dictionary doesn't have a single friendship flower everyone agrees on, but several meanings suit friends well. The gillyflower means bonds of affection, the zinnia means thoughts of absent friends, white clover means think of me, and the daisy means innocence. Today, yellow roses are widely given as friendship flowers too, even though the 19th-century books gave them a jealous meaning. For a friend, a cheerful mixed bouquet with a kind note works perfectly well.
What did Ophelia's flowers mean in Hamlet?
In Act 4, Scene 5 of Hamlet, Ophelia hands out flowers and herbs and names their meanings herself. Rosemary is for remembrance, and pansies are for thoughts. She also gives fennel, columbines and rue, which she calls herb of grace on Sundays, and a daisy, and says she would give violets but they all withered when her father died. Two of her meanings survived into Kate Greenaway's later flower dictionary almost unchanged: rosemary for remembrance and pansy for thoughts.
Can I use the language of flowers for a wedding bouquet?
Yes, and it's a lovely way to add meaning. Using Kate Greenaway's dictionary, you might combine orange blossoms for your purity equals your loveliness, myrtle for love, ivy for fidelity and marriage, and red and white roses together for unity. Check with your florist about which flowers are in season where you live, and consider printing the meanings on a small card for guests or tucking them into your program. Because old dictionaries disagree, naming your source keeps the message clear.
Sources
We checked every source below while writing this guide. Last reviewed October 30, 2026, by Joan Ramos.
- Language of Flowers, by Kate Greenaway (George Routledge and Sons) (Project Gutenberg)
- The Floral Offering: The Language of Flowers, by Henrietta Dumont (Philadelphia, 1851) (Project Gutenberg)
- Letters of the Right Honourable Lady M--y W--y M--e (1790 edition) (Project Gutenberg)
- Lady Mary Wortley Montague, Her Life and Letters (1689-1762), by Lewis Melville (Project Gutenberg)
- Hamlet, Act 4, Scene 5 (Folger Shakespeare Library)
- A Midsummer Night's Dream, Act 2, Scene 1 (Folger Shakespeare Library)
